Vayera (1b): Bring Along the Old Me

We explained in a previous post that Hashem upped the ante in the test of the Akeida by demanding of Avraham not to make the experience dry of emotions, rather to enter his full self into the picture. Avraham accomplished this and more.

The Pasuk says that when he went out to find the predetermined location he took Eliezer and Yishmael with him on the journey. "ויקח את שני נעריו אתו" He took the two lads with him. Rashi here brings from the Medrash and the Gemara in Chulin that this is the source that an important person must be accompanied with an entourage.

Rav Yitzchak of Radvil (and here) in the Ohr Yitzchak explains that while this is where we learn that an Adam Chashuv doesn't travel alone, this could not have been Avraham Avinu's intention. Avraham in this very Parsha describes himself as עפר ואפר, dust an ashes. He doesn't need the ego trip. So while we do learn the Halachah from him - what were his personal feelings?

The Rebbe explains that the words שני נעריוcan be translated not only as the two lads but also as "the years of his youth." Let's explain the implications of this re-reading.

Oftentimes when we seek to grow, we think that we need to destroy all connections to our former selves. Our exteriors vastly change. We estrange ourselves from past acquaintances. We take on personas foreign to our nature. While there is often a need to make powerful changes, the goal of Ruchniyus is not to forget who we naturally are but rather to include all facets of ourselves in our relationship with Hashem. When Chazal exclaim "חיילך לאורייתא" - plug your strengths into the Torah, they are telling us not to be cookie cutter. Each person based on his or her background, with their uniqueness and individuality has something special to bring to the table. Don't ignore that.

This is what is means when the Passuk is read that Avraham Avinu brought the years of his youth with him to the Akeida. He brought his whole life, his whole being and his total self. All of the longing to have a child, all of his innate desire to give all of his struggles and feelings of love. All of this and so, so much more was included in this amazing journey towards his greatest test.

Hashem wants this from us as well, and Avraham Avinu implanted in our souls the ability to come through and accomplish this amazing feat. We too can take every face and facet of our incredible souls, every experience we've ever had - our שני נעריו - and incorporate them into our relationship with Avinu SheBaShomayim.